There is a lot of grief in the world right now.
For you.
For me.
I hope your grief is not unbearable.
Despite all of it, I have gratitude as well. I don’t exactly like that word, “gratitude.” It has religious connotations to my ear. But, well, it works.
I am lucky that I can work from home. My company has been fantastic, and actually quite surprisingly agile.
All of my loved ones are still with me. We have had to be in the hospital with unrelated illnesses, and yet we are safe.
Since the last time I wrote on here two years ago, the new baby has grown. He’s two and a half now.
Grief
Oh, I am sad. Sad for my country, sad for humanity, sad for each person lost to this virus.
I try not to be sad for myself, but yes, I am. Serious illness struck my family just as the virus was catching on here in the US. It’s still very serious, and putting strain on all of us.
I am also angry. Mostly about how the government handles this pandemic. Profiteering and cronyism. Cynicism and pandering. Politicization of a public health emergency, for the purpose of making money.
Isolation
Because we’ve had several hospitalizations (not related to COVID-19), and taking care of one of our family, I am not as isolated as I want to be.
And yet I am lonely.
And this adds to my sadness.
Process
I’m using this to process. You would think there’s all kinds of extra time to do things like productive writing, yard work, etc. But no.
There is no time. There is even less time than when I was commuting two hours a day.
What a strange world.
What strangeness it is to see profit opportunity instead of humanitarian opportunities. What grotesque macabre times we live through.
Inane cruelty. Stupid selfishness.
What protest can we mount while physically distancing?
Find a way. Write. Put it out there.
Vote.